Rational AndThen...
2006-03-16 2:04 p.m.
�You can turn your back on a person, but, never turn your back on a drug. Especially when it's waving a razor-sharp hunting knife in your eye.�� Raoul Duke: Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.
I learned long before I ever read the book that arguing with a drug is pointless. For those metaphorically uninspired, I�m referring to a person under the influence of a drug.
Ever argue with a drunk? Ever win an argument with a drunk? I have. The win/loss ratio is about 1 in 40. The only reason I get that �1� is that one of my well visited avenues of entertainment happens to be contrarian drunkenness. Anyone under the control of any substance will either argue to the death or ignore the conversation. A drug is not a rational person. It is a drug.
As I�ve matured beyond the drugs of my past (and some of them have matured - slightly), I�ve found this applicable in many other instances. The first thing to take notice of in any quarrel is your opponent�s condition. Are they stoned? Drunk? Tweaked? Tired? Angry? Emotional? You want to take note of whether your opponent is rational. If they are rational, then a rational argument can ensue. Otherwise, the only way to proceed is irrationally.
The ONLY way to fight a drug is with a drug. And in this instance, the definition includes human irrational behavior. If you�ve no means of matching irrationality, exclude yourself from the confrontation as you will lose. Interacting with a drug will give you a �contact high�. If they are angry and you follow their thread, you will get angry. If they are stoned and you follow along, you will begin to seem stoned. If they are emotional, well you�re fucked.
So how does one win this situation? One does not. Concede the battle in preparation for the next skirmish...
�They probably did say all those mean things to you.�
�Your boss does hate you�
�Yes, they�re all trying to get you.�
�Maybe she is cheating.�
�You�re right, I�m fat And I�m boring.�
Concede. Allow them to vent. Give them nothing to make things worse. Any response to the contrary is nothing more than a gasoline underwear on the sun.
And then� when sober. When rational. Fire back. Calmly, rationally � with snipers precision. They will be unprepared. More importantly, they will be rational.