Towers

2001-09-17 3:27 p.m.

...This was written on Wednesday night after the WTC tragedy. I hadn't had internet access until today so here ya go!!!

Here I am 36 hours after the terrible event that went down blocks away from my job. I've been glued to my TV since I walked into my apartment covered in soot and coughing up a lung after inhaling pieces of building and whatever else was floating around in the thick, white smoky air...

I got up yesterday 8:00 AM EST, Tuesday, September 11th, 2001, just as I do every day. I dragged ass on the way to the shower, shaving, dressing, slowly and groggy from another night of work, Guinness, and Newport Mediums. I left my apartment at about 9AM and got the J train moments later. From the platform, we could see the top of both Trade Center Towers on fire. It looked fairly surreal. I was groggy and confused. It seemed weird to see the grey/black smoke billowing from the towers. It came heavily from the left tower and seemingly only from one floor from the right one. I looked around me on the platform and noticed everyone staring in awe and confusion. Glad to know I wasn't nuts and this was REALLY happening, I began to worry.

I forgot my phone this morning, so I couldn't call in to talk to my manager whom was already at work, a building which shares the skyline with the two now missing towers that were on their way down. They hadn't been on their way down at the time. Everyone in the train car had been glued to one side before we went into the tunnel. It seemed that no one around me actually knew why the buildings were on fire.

After getting across the Williamsburg Bridge, we were kicked off the train due to the commotion at the stops ahead. After I got off at Chambers (which is the Brooklyn Bridge stop on the 4/5/6 train), I came out and was surrounded by concerned New Yorkers. There were probably a couple thousand people staring at the top of the towers. At this point we were about a mile or so from the towers, but in clear view. Since I had no phone and the lines at pay phones were long, I had decided to walk to work. I've made the walk plenty of times, usually even further from the East Village or what not in a stumbling manner, so this walk wasn't a big deal. Beyond the idea of dodging confused, awe stricken New Yorkers dressed for work or school.

There had been people on Wall Street, and Fulton, and John Street, and the surrounding areas in large groups surrounding tiny radios hanging on every syllable. Everyone was confused. How could the WTC be on fire?!?!? The announcer had mentioned that a plane had hit the Towers. My original thoughts had been freak accident. The announcer mentioned that it could have been intentional. My cynicism, based on being a part of inner city groups against police brutality, and any other big brother vs. blue collar organizations and groups. I thought that it was strange that a radio announcer would start spreading ignorant rumors.

I got to Broad Street at a little before 10. I don't recall the exact time because this is when things got a bit wild. I had been looking for a pay phone to call my girl. She works in the NYSE and I wanted to make sure she was out of the building. I still didn't know what was going on, but I didn't think it would be a good idea to be inside any major institution at the time.

As I was in line for a pay phone, in plain view of the NYSE and blocks from my own job, an astounding rumble overtook the street. It seemed to shake the earth but more so, it shook our stomachs. We couldn't see anything but the smoke above the city. The Towers had been out of plain view and people had already been in a bit of fear due to the confusion and the announcements and rumors spreading. If you've ever been near enough to an airport to hear planes fly above, consider that screaming engine noise tims fifty. It shook all of us and brought absolute panic within seconds.

While at the corner of Broad and Beaver (about 6 NYC blocks from the Towers - it's about 20 blocks to a mile), our stomachs turned from the amazing noise that engulfed the entire area as if it were coming from our own heads. A man screamed... "What the fuck is that?!?! Oh Shit!! What the fuck is that noise?!? Aw fuck!!! What the..." He stopped abruptly and began screaming almost as hastily running towards the FDR in full stride. He was followed by about 300 to 400 screaming New Yorkers panicked and befuddled� no really, the fear in their faces and eyes was horrendous.

I've never known myself to be very panicky. My adrenaline had been pumping, but my exterior had remained calm. I stepped aside as the people ran for their lives. As far as I could tell, we were being bombed. I could swear that I was about to see the surrounding area covered in missile explosions and gun fire. A mn screamed, "They hit the NYSE!! Get the fuck out of here, they hit the NYSE!!!" My heart dropped to my nuts and my eyes strained. The impact with the building was just as loud as the plane and the explosion was obvious. I walked to the deli guys standing in front of his store with a radio in his hand. I asked him... Well, practically begged him to tell me what the fuck just happened. "Another plane hit the Towers... No it wasn't the NYSE, it was the Towers again."

My sprits rose... I still hadn't talked to my girl, and I wasn't sure that the guy was right, but he was less panicked, and I hoped my girl was still alive. I stepped back onto Broad Street; dodging hysterical people running in every direction, not knowing where to go� not knowing what was safe. They had all run towards the water on the East Side of the island. I could no longer see the NYSE. Instead, a title wave of white debris and smoke had been charging in my direction. I still had been fairly calm. My heart was racing, but my feet were calm, as was my intuition.

I stepped back and against the wall and watched the dust cloud pass by and flourish on to the block I was on. It swirled over head and covered my mouth and nose with my shirt. I saw pieces of paper and cardboard looking things as well as a SHITLOAD of dust devastate the corner I was on. It was hard to see and hard to breathe. It was still thin in comparison to what was still to come. The debris was still thick and it devoured the air, but it seemed to even out. I stepped back to Broad Street.

I helped some lady stand and led her in the right direction. I crossed the street to a couple of confused people who were coughing and covered in dust. They didn't know where they were, or where to go. I led them a bit and pointed to the water. I went back and helped a few more people stand or find their direction. I stayed on Broad Street for as long as I could bare. I had been covering my face my shirt. I was light on my feet and forgot I had my bag on my back with my laptop in it. My eyes began to burn. Finally, after some time, a tower had finally collapsed. The dust cloud was enormous. It devoured the street fast and without remorse. I could do nothing but crouch down and run.

I ran to the FDR and bolted left. There had been a lot less panic there, but still plenty of confusion. Eventually, some order came about there from city workers and a few police officers (mind you there were VERY few, as in 2 or 3, at first). Everyone began to walk uptown along the highway. We couldn't see far. The sun was out, but it was blocked by the smoke. I couldn't see the sky or much around me besides confused people helping each other organize and remain calm as we headed towards the bridges.

The FDR rises above the street as an elevated highway down there. From what I knew, we were under attack. From what I could hear, I wasn't the only one that thought so. I didn't want to be around so many people, nor did I want to be on an elevated roadway. I hopped the divider and walked towards the bridges under the FDR. Rumors spread among us all of the planes that the terrorist shad and about the hit at the Pentagon and of a possible hit in Chicago. I learned later that that was only an evacuation at the Sears Tower.

Every time we heard fighter jets we all ducked a bit and looked at each other. From here on, the struggle was to breathe and see. I have mad respect to the guys at the seaport handing out towels to cover our mouths and noses with. We walked up... After we got out of the smoke, it was still a little hard to breath but now we had to battle the sun for the long walk. All I could really think about were my girl and my co-workers. I work in a small office, so I'm pretty close to the people I work with. I was worried and I hoped everyone was alright. We have customers in the WTC and I was worried we may have had a technician there. I still didn't know for sure whether or not the NYSE was still standing. I almost had tears in my eyes built by my own ignorance as to whether or not my girl was alright.

I looked back occasionally to see the smoke covering half the city, we all began our walk to shelter or home. I was looking forward to at least a couple miles to the Williamsburg Bridge, and then a couple more miles to my apartment...

I stopped at payphones and tried to call anyone. I finally got my girl's mom and found out she was OK and headed uptown...

I give mad respect to the group of Jewish guys at the end of the Williamsburg Bridge handing out fresh drinking water to all of us crossing. Man did that help....

I know my story isn't as amazing or as close as many of the stories I've been hearing for the last day and a half, but this is what it was like just a few blocks away. I can't even fathom what it was like inches away or even in the building. It's all rather surreal, and too much to take in at once. I've been glued to the TV, which is strange in my world, because I almost never watch TV. My heart goes to all the families who are in mourning as well as the injured. My heart and respect also goes to all the workers and departments involved in rescuing people as well as bringing people to their final burial place.

I'm going to go try to volunteer tomorrow, as well as give some blood.

Peace and Love.